I'm back!

So you thought you could get rid of me, eh? This is like that part in the horror movie where everyone thinks the monster is dead, but then it just 'appears' again. I can only hope that you take a slightly more optimistic view on me.Anyway, what was I going to say? Oh yes, exams (shock horror!). Lots of exams (double shock horror!), and some of them one and a half hours long (double shock gulp horror!). And that means revision (double shock double gulp horror!), which is what I've been doing all this time. And when I get back to school (tonight!) I'm going to start boarding (double shock double gulp horror horror scream!). All of this explains my variable mood, jumping between:

• A smidgen worried.
• Mildly sad, rather sad and everything in between.
• Utterly terrified.

I'm sure it'll be alright, though.

But before you go off and feel depressed, some news. We went to see Pirates of the Caribbean 3 yesterday (very good, watch it!), and are going to the Reading Museum today. We were planning on visiting a stately home, but Berkshire is a little on the rainy side today *laughs sarcastically*. On the computing side of things, I have downloaded Jave. A clever little program, it allows you to create ASCII art just like that... ...'Just like what?', I hear you cry. 'Like that!' I reply. I'm smarter than I look. Here is an example: ______ / ____ \ / /____\ \_______________ \________|@______________\ / ______ |_______________/ \ \____/ / \______/ Cool, isn't it?All for now, bye!

Mixed box

As you heard, I have taken the pledge against Doctor Who. If you too wish to join Overanxious Anonymous, please drop a comment! In the meantime, I hand you over to Prof. Lazarus and his dedicated psychiatrist: Shrink: So, Mr. Lazarus, do enjoy your life as a horribly deformed lobster-thing? Lazarus: Frankly, no. People scream, run away and even try to kill me, would you believe it? And there's more... Shrink: No? Lazarus: Oh yes. Despite the fact that I can destroy iron bulkheads and crush coconuts without batting a limb, I'm still ineligible for the Mr. Universe competition! Shrink: So life's not great? Lazarus: You're quick. Say, you look tasty. Slurp, slurp. Shrink: I'll refer you to a plastic surgeon, is that good? Lazarus: Great! He'll do for afters! But don't go yet! There's more! I learned from my sister that there is a poem to do with children leaving assembly. Great! Those with the insanity to read/listen to it are treated to the varied manners in which they leave. For instance, Mrs. Water's class trickled out. Bored yet? Do not fear! For here (to quote an American phrase) is my two cents: Mr. Procrastinator's class left it until tomorrow. Mrs. Indecision's class weren't too sure, or maybe they were... Miss. Atheist's class didn't believe it was time to go yet... ...and Ms. Skeptic's class weren't convinced either. Mr. Communist's class thought they all ought to have left at the same time. Mrs. Pessimist's class didn't see the point. And Miss. Apathetic's class just couldn't be bothered. Some quick news. I'm listening to Classic FM (not the Yugoslavian version that I had previously) and I'm going to see a recording of I'm Sorry I Haven't a Clue this evening. I need a lie down now!

Quickly quick quickie

I will not be watching Doctor Who tomorrow. When they start coming up with stuff usually found in dodgy fish restaurants, my precious hours of sleep drop fast. No thank you! Byee!

Goings on

I am currently taking advantage of a Wednesday evening at home to write this, that's why I love the summer term. This is just a quick update. For reasons unknown, my school managed to lose the entire of last week into the administrative ether. Don't ask me where it went, it just went. I slept so badly the night before that I may well have really missed out a week. Just one more thing before I go. I looked at the monster for next week's Doctor Who in the Radio Times. I do not suggest you do likewise. Yours very worriedly, Choules 3